It’s that time of year once again…

Posted on 08.15.2012

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Every year around this time of the summer I wake up and go to bed nauseous. I want to throw up. Every day.

It’s that time of year where you know the school year is approaching, it’s always on my mind in some capacity and, in some sick way, I look forward to this feeling. It reminds me that I love my job so damn much.

The anticipation builds because of what might come:

The physical strain of waking up at 5 and going to bed at 11. On a good day. The physical strain of making sure I exercise and eat the way I want.

The emotional strain listening to the news of “reformers” telling me teachers do not matter, that public education doesn’t matter and not having my voice heard. The fear of losing my job and the feeling of being judged not for the work I do but for the work I am not doing by someone else’s measure.

The strain of working in a district that is always in flux, of having mandates told to me instead of being trusted to to do right thing. Of not knowing who my principal is, or what bell schedule we are on; or what formal observations might be happening.

Of having to work with over 160 students, 200 faculty and juggling those personalities because everyone has something valuable they contribute to my classroom. Of running 3 clubs that are more like classes in-of-themselves. Of coordinating an additional program and all the while still having a personal life.

The anticipation still builds where I can’t sleep because I want to make my curriculum stronger and teacher practice tighter. I am thrilled at the possibility of teaching better and planning the year. Of going into the school year with the curriculum prepared, handouts ready and UbD’s written.

Of being so excited for being creative with my plans and pushing my own thinking on issues of real importance that I can explore with my students.

I cannot wait to work with my co-workers with staff development, to explore new ways to deliver instruction and to create an even safer, healthier and more productive school environment for us all.

Every morning I wake up knowing I am one day closer from learning and exploring with the students I work with, of feeling the love in the classroom and school grow as we each undertake new challenges as individuals and as a collective.

This time of year is always the hardest because of what the rest of the year might hold.

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